Saving Your Marriage

by: jameswalsh
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Word Count: 726

Studies reveal that almost 50% of marriages fail and end in a divorce because couples are failing to approach the problem until it is too late. All relationships have good times and rough times. All that is required is the need to know how to keep love strong and resolve problems truly.

Salvaging your Marriage

When marriage is at the edge of dissolution, couples tend to lose faith in each other. They feel helpless and see divorce as the sole resolve. No matter how big the problem is, if there is a hope, your marriage can definitely be saved.

But before plunging in to save your marriage, there are certain things which should be clarified. First, to determine if both the partners have the mutual desire to save the relationship. Next is to identify the source of the problem and look for a possible solution. Finally, a positive attitude is crucial if one wants to save a marriage. All the bitterness and differences should be but put aside and let go of the negative emotions to make a sincere effort to renew a relationship.

There are several ways to re-build the lost faith in a relationship

Communicate – Communicating is an art that married couples need to learn to understand each other. It is essential to maintain an open line of communication between partners. Problems arise when there is poor or no communication between the couple. This results in accumulation of grudges and grievances till one day when it overflows and bursts out. Hence, communication is the keyword for a successful marriage.

Understand your Partner –Figure out how your partner perceives the problem and face the fact that though he/she may like you but is disturbed with the significant and persistent problems he/she sees in you. Though, when you go down to the root of the problem it might be a mere misunderstanding that has taken the shape of a problem. But the main thing is working hard towards resolving it.

Spend Time Together - According to research the biggest reason for a marital breakdown is that the couples do not spending a lot of time together. Everything else like children, career, hobbies etc. takes a higher priority while relationship with the spouse takes a back seat. Unattended relationships often end in trouble. People fight on petty issues thus deepening the problem further. Try to spend some time alone with your partner go on vacations, pleasure trips, weekend getaways etc.

Have more sex – People who complain that the spark has gone away from their marriage need to revamp their sex life. With time, the sexual urge of a person reduces and sex becomes more of a routine than pleasure. Marital life loses its charm and people start looking for alternatives. These results in relationship break down and finally divorce. In order to save the marriage it is necessary that the urge for sex with your partner is rekindled. Spend some time together, have sex as you used to have previously, and if required have more than what you had earlier. Sex is an enormous stress buster and will help you regain closeness with your partner.

Plan a family – Believing that babies are a ticket to save marriage is very true. It renews the bond between a man and a woman. A newborn baby can make the fathers feel closer, wanted and loved by the family. It brings new joy and meaning to life and everything changes after the entry of the little one. Hence, saying that having a baby is a quick fix solution for strained marriages is indeed true.

Take advice – After trying out everything possible to save a marriage one should not forget the last resort, advice of a marriage counsellor. There are adequate and affordable marriage counsellors available who can give expert advice on such issues. The sooner you get help, the better it is for both of you.

The Final Word

There are many other things that you can follow in day to day life to save a relationship such as working as a team, hugging your partner often, celebrating special days together etc. If you fail once don’t lose heart. Try and try again instead of giving up easily. Always remember that it takes much less energy to improve a failing marriage than going through the anguish of divorce. The future of one’s marriage lies in one’s own hands.

About the Author

James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. If you want to find out more about a solicitor managed divorce see http://www.managed-divorce.co.uk

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