Why Men Choose to Divorce?
by: jameswalsh
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Word Count: 735
However, in this case we want to talk of the minority community of men today, who file for divorce against their wives. It should be pointed out that the number of men who want to hold on to a marriage after the wife has decided to walk out are very few.
There is a lot of debate going on over the legal aspect of it all. Apparently, it is the lack of strong (and more complicated) laws that is causing this tsunami of divorces. But if two people want to part, no force in the world can hold them together, just like no one can ultimately stop them from coming together either. But the point is that why do men want to part with their better halves who turn so very bitter? The reasons are way too many and the statistics are far from reliable. People do not enjoy talking straight from the heart when the government census people turn up, and divorce is definitely a touchy issue.
Sharing Duties, Responsibilities and Blames
Most men are somewhat more self-righteous by nature than women. That is why a man can rarely stand it if he is blamed. While it is true that the UK has more unfaithful husbands by far than wives, it is also true that many men are seriously henpecked by absurdly suspicious wives to a point where they just want to give up.
It is not just the question of infidelity. With men and women both working now and earning in the same bracket (and many women are earning more), the distribution of rights and duties and, therefore, the responsibilities within the marriage are becoming increasingly difficult. Who should mow the lawn? Who will change the baby at night? Who will do the dishes or the washing? These are the typical daily chores that are a pain to both men and women when there is a general lack of time for anything at all. If a man does not want to do certain chores, it does not always indicate that he is being chauvinistic. That is an over-simplification and an escape route. A man may simply be too busy and stressed with work to bother about anything else. And when there are children around, matters are bound to get yet more complicated.
Errant Wives
Yes, in 75% of the cases where infidelity is the ground for divorce, the man is the one to blame, and deservingly so. But what about the remaining 25% of the applicants? No man will be able to sleep in peace beside an errant wife whose heart is with someone else. This is not just a case of anger and outrage at being cuckolded, but it is also the ultimate blow to a man’s self-esteem. It is the worst possible way to let a man know that he has not succeeded where someone else has, and that he is not good enough. Many people just cannot recover from the blow for the rest of their lives and do not marry again.
On the other hand, there are men who become unfaithful themselves to get out of a marriage that is a prison for both in it. The divorce is then just a formal way of burning the boat, but the actual marriage has ended long ago in the true sense of the term. Most of these affairs are transient and once the fling has served its purpose, many men have been able to start afresh all over again.
Work, Work, Work
This need not be underlined, but the UK has the longest working hours among all European nations. To make matters worse, most SMEs expect their employees to accept irregular hours, terrible deadlines and gruelling schedules to be a part of life. By the time any office goer reaches his or her mid thirties and is in the undecided phase called ‘middle management’, they are also quite exhausted. How is a husband expected to make romantic gestures at the end of a twelve-hour working day? He would just like to sleep like a log after a good dinner, and there is nothing abnormal about this. We are human beings and when we are tired, we cannot let romance flourish. Marriages will go with thinning hair, growing paunches and dimming eyesight. Work is a killer, but one cannot survive in the race without some sacrifices.
About the Author
James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. If you would like more information on how to get a quickie Divorce see http://www.quickie-divorce.com
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